Sweeney Todd: The Horny Barber Of Fleet Street
by WolfboyRules
Summary: This is my first spoof ever so please be nice. Sweeney Todd like you've never seen him before.
1. Chapter 1

Seacne 1: Blood

(See Title)

Séance 2: London

(There's a sailor named Anthony Hope. Who is looking at London like there's no tomorrow. Then there's a other man named Sweeney Todd. He's looking at London like his pissed off.)

Anthony: (Singing) London how I love you.

Sweeney: Just fuck off already.

Anthony: What do you mean?

Sweeney: Never mind.

Anthony: Okay. (Goes back to singing.) Londonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn…

Sweeney: I wonder how long he can hold out that note?

Anthony:nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn(Breathes)

Sweeney: If you start again I will hurt you.

Anthony:nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn(Sweeney hits him multiple times.) Ow.

Sweeney: I told you.

Anthony: Aren't you supposed to be singing about a barber and his wife?

Sweeney Oh yeah, but I don't want to you ruin to whole mood.

Anthony: How?

Sweeney: By holding out that note.

Anthony: But I didn't mean to.

Sweeney: To bad.

Helena, Tim, and Johnny: What?

Sweeney: Who the fuck are you?

Anthony: I don't know, but the one on the far right looks a lot like you.

Sweeney: Your right.

Anthony: Yes!

Helena: Get on with it!

Sweeney: What if I don't want to?

Helena: Mrs. Lovett will come and make out with you.

Sweeney: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Helena: She'll do it.

Sweeney: Okay we'll get on with it.

Helena: Thank you.

Sweeney: Your not welcome.

Helena: Fuck you Sweeney Todd.

Sweeney: I don't know I mean I've met you, but you are HOT. So I guess a quickie would do.

Helena: Okay (Walks away)

Tim: I'm losing her to a fictional character.

Johnny: Okay.

Sweeney: (Yelling from were ever him and Helena went) That's right bitch.( Loud moans everyone else thinks it's Helena.)


	2. Chapter 2

Seacne 1: Blood

(See Title)

Séance 2: London

(There's a sailor named Anthony Hope. Who is looking at London like there's no tomorrow. Then there's a other man named Sweeney Todd. He's looking at London like his pissed off.)

Anthony: (Singing) London how I love you.

Sweeney: Just fuck off already.

Anthony: What do you mean?

Sweeney: Never mind.

Anthony: Okay. (Goes back to singing.) Londonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn…

Sweeney: I wonder how long he can hold out that note?

Anthony:nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn(Breathes)

Sweeney: If you start again I will hurt you.

Anthony:nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn(Sweeney hits him multiple times.) Ow.

Sweeney: I told you.

Anthony: Aren't you supposed to be singing about a barber and his wife?

Sweeney Oh yeah, but I don't want to you ruin to whole mood.

Anthony: How?

Sweeney: By holding out that note.

Anthony: But I didn't mean to.

Sweeney: To bad.

Helena, Tim, and Johnny: What?

Sweeney: Who the fuck are you?

Anthony: I don't know, but the one on the far right looks a lot like you.

Sweeney: Your right.

Anthony: Yes!

Helena: Get on with it!

Sweeney: What if I don't want to?

Helena: Mrs. Lovett will come and make out with you.

Sweeney: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Helena: She'll do it.

Sweeney: Okay we'll get on with it.

Helena: Thank you.

Sweeney: Your not welcome.

Helena: Fuck you Sweeney Todd.

Sweeney: I don't know I mean I've met you, but you are HOT. So I guess a quickie would do.

Helena: Okay (Walks away)

Tim: I'm losing her to a fictional character.

Johnny: Okay.

Sweeney: (Yelling from were ever him and Helena went) That's right bitch.( Loud moans everyone else thinks it's Helena.)


End file.
